Earlier this week I was in a session with my therapist. Yes, I still have one and I also have a coach. I have found them both to be invaluable for my healing and growth. I look forward to my sessions. I am still surprised sometimes by what I discover or the clarity I can get by the end of a session.
During my last session we were discussing a topic that shows up often for me; my fear and insecurities about "putting myself out there" or "exposing myself". I am a pretty private person, not a big social media expert and I would consider myself an introvert until I get to know someone well and I feel comfortable. Even posting on social media terrifies me sometimes. It seems so ridiculous to say it out loud or write it, however it's the truth.
In my most recent training program I have been required to do many of those things that push me way beyond my comfort zone. Sometimes so much so I almost convince myself that it's simply not for me. What always helps reel me back in and to keep me motivated is having the opportunity to help someone and possibly make a positive difference in their lives. However, my brain often has others ideas and it tries it's best to sabotage me by putting thoughts of doubt in my mind.
My doctor had the grace to remind me of something that made a big difference to me that day while in my throes of self doubt. She said what she has noticed over the years where life coaching has become more and more popular, is that many of the people that become coaches are people who have been through some kind of struggle. It's not something that we decided early on to do or planned when figuring out what kind of career we wanted. It's because we experience something, discover how life coaching can help and then feel compelled to help others. For some, it does not feel like a choice, it feels like a must. Some people prefer to get help from those that have been through a similar experience and that's what may set someone like myself apart.
There is room for all kinds of help in this world. We are not here to compete or try to be better than someone else. Most of us simply want to help. We all have something unique to bring to others and you get to decide what feels best to you. I think that's a beautiful thing.
I am thankful for being reminded of that.
Until next time,
For more information or to schedule a free 20 minute consultation, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
I would like to share my story about "Think Of Me Always". Life certainly has a way of weaving things in peculiar ways without us being the least bit aware of what lies ahead.
Just under 3 years prior to my son's passing, one of his closet friends, unexpectedly passed away. They grew up together as his parents and I have also been close friends since high school. As the boys became adults, they connected on their own and continued their friendship. One of the things that strengthened their bond was their love of music and guitar.
For his friends service, my son created vinyl stickers of his friend in a perfect silhouette of what he loved doing most. They were done in a way to perfectly capture his friends essence. It was an amazing reminder of who he was and I'm guessing, how he would have preferred to be remembered. It was a small gift for those who knew him and for those who didn't as well. It seemed to provide some comfort regardless.
We talked about how his vinyl stickers were received and appreciated. I encouraged him to pursue it and consider offering it to others. During one of our conversations, he shared a name he thought would be appropriate for this type of business. I'm sure you guessed, it was Think Of Me Always. I loved it enough that I bought the domain name so that it would be available for him if he ever wanted to use it.
When deciding what name to use for my own business, this name kept coming up for me. I had other names I had already been considering but nothing felt right. It was because this name had so much meaning to me. It was my way of honoring him. It felt perfectly right.
Think Of Me Always is my way to remember my son with not just sadness, but to remember his heart, thoughtfulness and creativity. I'm pretty sure he'd be okay with that.
Below is a photo of the sticker he created for his friend. My hope is that they are doing some amazing jamming together once again.
With all my love.
We are all on a journey. Some of us were given a road to follow that we didn't ask for and one that we never would have wanted. So here we are. In my mind I always think of it as "The Unwanted Journey" or "The Unchosen Journey". Part of my journey consists of the loss of my son.
I used to say that if anything ever happens to one of my kids, you may as well take me as well because I could never handle it. It was my worst nightmare and fear. I know you can relate. I have even found myself wondering if somehow I caused this to happen because I feared it so much. Thinking that way just added to my pain. I noticed many other thoughts swirling around in my mind that tried to assign myself some kind of blame. Even thinking this should have never happened and he didn't deserve this made me feel like crap because there was nothing I could do to change it.
What I eventually began to realize is that by resisting my current reality, I was not helping myself to move forward and allow myself to begin the healing process. I may not have asked for or wanted this road to walk but I figured I had two choices. I could move forward and see what lies ahead for me, or stay stuck where I was. Staying stuck did not seem like a viable option. I could not imagine feeling the way I did for the rest of my life. That does not mean I would ever feel happy about what happened or that I didn't wish that it could be different. However, spending all of my time and energy thinking in that way was not helping me feel any better, it was making me feel worse.
I decided to try working toward some acceptance for my life as it now is. That felt like a first step that I could allow myself to take. It allowed me to begin to heal without the added burden of resistance. My hope for you is that you can try to begin to let go of some of the resistance that you may be experiencing in your own life by allowing a little bit of acceptance for yourself instead.
Until next time,
For more information or to schedule a free 20 minute consultation email me at email@example.com
Thank you for visiting my page!
I'd like to start by telling you a little bit about me and why I created this page and what my motivation and intentions are.
I did my first Life Coach training about 10 years ago. I'm a bit of a self help/self improvement junkie kinda gal so when I first found out about Life Coaching, I was all about getting a certification in coaching. I have taken numerous trainings and have certifications in various coaching areas. I never strongly pursued making a thriving coaching practice because
I always seemed to find another class or program I wanted to take. Money was never really the motivating factor as I've had a good career in the aviation industry for over 20 years.
Then my life as I once knew it would be forever changed.. On April 14th, 2017 my oldest son died in a tragic accident at work. He was 33 years old. He left behind his wife and his seven year old son that absolutely adored him.
I am grateful for a wonderful therapist that has helped me tremendously through my initial trauma. I am also grateful for my own training and some of the tools that have been very helpful for my journey. I pondered with the idea for some time but eventually came to the decision that I was ready to make use of what I have learned from my own experience, as well as the training I have had and help others going through theirs.
As in most things in life and as much as we may try, it's hard to put yourselves in someones else's shoes unless you've walked a similar path. Sometimes we need someone to take the first steps with us or simply know there is someone else that is there to walk with you and that understands in a very relatable way. That is what I am here to help you do if that is what you so desire.
Until next time,